The Search

I haven't posted in a while because i have been on a trip around Oregon looking at colleges. As I looked at college I realized I can't wait to go, but I am scared as hell to go. I went to see Oregon State University first. This school is huge! It has over 30,000 students and covers nearly 500 acres of land (which is a lot).The campus is magnificent, it is one of the prettiest schools I have seen. The next school I went to see was the University of Oregon. This school is very similar to Oregon State except the campus is smaller. The I realized why I am so scared of college. Cities scared the shit out of me! I am from a tiny town where i know everyone. Being somewhere where it takes as long to get across the city as it does to get across my county scares me. I guess I have come (and not for the first time) to the conclusion that my small town life has left me almost crippled to the outside world. Other than that I can't wait to go to college. And overcoming adversity is what it's all about right? So I'll keep tryin' to survive high school, then Nut Up and go live in a city (more than 20,000 people, at least in my eyes). College where my insecurities and biases will change, hopefully for the better.

Epic Fail

So I was diagnosed with sports induced asthma a while ago. Well, the medicine didn't work and I went on surviving feeling exhausted after every time I exercised. A few weeks ago I went to a lung specialist to see what was up. She right off the bat ruled out asthma. Great months after I was diagnosed I was going to be re-diagnosed. If only it were that simple. She sent me to get test after test and every time there was a lead on something, it was dashed to pieces after another test was done. Finally, when I saw her she had no idea what was wrong with me. What was the next step? FUCK! the doctor didn't even know. I mean I'm not dying or anything but running is very difficult and any exercise throws me into a spasm of pain. The medical field has no idea what to do next. Their tests showed nothing so they in turn can't do shit. AWWWWWWWWWWWW! It just amazes me that there seems to be no fix. This is bullshit and I am scared and frustrated, and amazed that someone can pay soo much for absolutely no answers.

So It Begins

This morning I woke up at 5:30 did my chores and left for baseball practice. My addiction to baseball has been ingrained in me since before I can remember. My first baseball game was on a saturday the spring after I turned five. My game was that afternoon, but I was so excited that I got dressed in my baseball uniform in the morning. Then, went to our couch and sat down. My mom then came and asked me what I was doing. I replied "I'm waiting for dad to pick me up for my baseball game," and that is pretty much what I did. I didn't leave that room except for lunch until my dad came to get me. If this doesn't show my obsession with baseball I really don't know what will. I think baseball is one one of the few things that helps me survive high school at all.

Just FYI there will probably quite a few more posts on baseball in the future.

Technicality

Today I went to a school function in which a friend and I submitted a website as a project. Well, we didn't win, but we did manage to get disqualified. How you ask? well we submitted our website using adobe dreamweaver. We did not however, get an FTP client or a host to get the website actually up and running. We just coded the site. It says nothing in the rule book about getting the site all the way to the web. According to the judges it was "a given" rule. That is complete BULLSHIT! This competition is so high and mighty they think they can make a rule a "given"? The judges even told us we would have advanced our project had we had it up and running. Getting a website up costs money, i am a high schooler with an 8 dollar an hour summer job. They think I can afford to pay for some bullshit competition? Screw Them! Here are my grievances:

1. It wasn't in the rule book
2. They judged it four days ago (I wasted a whole day)
3. They could have told us in advance
4. Patronizing us as if we should have know

So you know wat? Screw them, if conforming to the society of today means to have to put up with the upper class bullshit, then its not worth it. I'll become a hermit and show those bitches whats up!

Ok, sorry this is a shitty piece of writing, but I just needed to rant and rave about this. again my apologies.